BC Community Thread For Non-Sightings Chat

[kirbenvost]

Haha, she'd be like "WHERE'S THE DIAMOND YOU JERK?!?". XD And then I'd tell her mom it's more practical and everything would be okay... after a few months on the couch.

Thanks though. Yeah 8 years is a long time. It's been tough at times but we're lucky.

[Darth Cylon]

Your gf is geeky too, right? The Green Lantern Wedding Ring is perfect for you!

[kirbenvost]

A little bit. But I think something Avengers or X-Men would be more her style. Or Sailor Moon.

[jjwankenobi]

Originally Posted by kirbenvost

Thanks though. Yeah 8 years is a long time. It's been tough at times but we're lucky.

My advice to you (which may sound strange coming from a father of 3) is don't have kids if you don't want to. If you're both happy with your life and the freedom it affords don't let anyone tell you otherwise. I've got you covered if you're concerned about furthering the human race .

I know a couple that had kids because they thought it was the next logical step in their marriage. They are the most miserable people I know.

My children are precious, don't get me wrong. I get to experience things all over again through them. I'd lie, cheat, steal, kill for them. But fatherhood/parenthood isn't for everyone and I believe it's a brave thing to realize that beforehand.

Now your GF may feel compelled to have children in which case you're screwed unless you're on the same page. In which case I say live your free life to the fullest before you become prisoners in your own home for 10 years.

[kirbenvost]

Thank you for the very honest advice. We're lucky in that most of our friends are where we are in their lives so there's not much peer pressure yet, and most of our family is understanding or obviously want us to get married first. And the ones who would probably bug us most about having kids we don't see often anyway, so that's alright.

It used to be that I wanted kids and she didn't, then we both got used to being young and free and childless but now I think we're at the point where we feel like we probably want 1 or 2 eventually, but not yet. Neither of us feel responsible enough to devote all our time to a tiny version of ourselves yet. We're getting pretty good at taking care of our old cat though, so that's a step in the right direction.

She is starting to feel compelled a bit though. Before, babies were kind of foreign and gross and unfathomable, and now holding our friend's sister's baby was probably the best thing that happened to her all year. And she watches documentaries. So I may be eventually doomed. Haha, but it's okay, because I always saw myself having kids eventually anyway. I do want to have that experience of seeing the world and growing up again through their eyes.

[jjwankenobi]

Originally Posted by kirbenvost

And she watches documentaries. So I may be eventually doomed.

Dude...you are fucked .

I got "fixed" last December and wifey still pulls the "I wish we had another baby" routine out of her hat from time to time, especially after watching those God-forsaken documentaries

Right now she's really into parenting books which she admonishes me for not reading. I admit I do rely on her to instruct me on how to improve my parenting skills. It's tricky, the little things you can do and say that make your kids to not only hear you but have them do what you ask.

[g loonie]

Originally Posted by jjwankenobi

Dude...you are fucked .

Haha, this was my exact reaction, only because that's what happened with me. My wife is due in Jan but prior to getting pregnant she would watch baby documentaries.

also, before proposing to her i'd have to sit through endless episodes of "say yes to the dress". that show is the worst.

[kirbenvost]

^Hah, I know those damn wedding shows... not only do you have to sit and put up with all that girl drama they love to have, it also gives your girlfriend unrealistic expectations for these grand weddings that normal people can't afford. Damn you, wedding shows!!!

Originally Posted by jjwankenobi

Dude...you are fucked .

I got "fixed" last December and wifey still pulls the "I wish we had another baby" routine out of her hat from time to time, especially after watching those God-forsaken documentaries

LOL. I know, it's like 2 hours of just babies playing! How can you just sit and watch that?! Although she watches the ones with kittens instead too and those are admittedly entertaining...

I think after 3 kids you have every right to say 'No, honey', even if it were possible to have more.

Right now she's really into parenting books which she admonishes me for not reading. I admit I do rely on her to instruct me on how to improve my parenting skills. It's tricky, the little things you can do and say that make your kids to not only hear you but have them do what you ask.

Yeah, I bet there a lot of tricks to learn. I bet that stuff works on adults who aren't as responsible as they could be as well... something to keep in mind, haha. I'll probably be the one reading the parenting books and using the tricks not only on the kids but on her too. I already do stuff like giving her a choice between two chores. I may not always get the more pleasant one but at least I don't have to do it all.

[Darth Cylon]

What documentaries? I love those BBC nature doc with Sir David Attenborough.

[kirbenvost]

Just whatever is on Netflix. There are so many. I think there's one just called "Babies". That one was almost interesting because they followed families from different cultures and it was kind of fascinating to see the differences in how people do things. But still, cursed documentaries and their suggestive power!